iresistable unexpected

A whole package of life has been passed over my heart, well the day that i thought it's going to be different has yet become so much distressful enough. I never believe it's going to be straight in front of my head and never realize I'm going to be a keeper or the one that can be keep for own good. It's sucks when i knew it and realizing that it's much more suck if i never knew it.

I do believe that yet it will hampered me and yes it's hampered me.. i wondering days by days how this happen and why i got this blind affection with no sign road and without noticing that it will never arrived into the gates that i want to be. WHAT's gate? gate of happiness gate's where i can diminish all my sadly and unexpected memories that i keep down inside my heart. Yes and yes I'm still on my own way through the gate and get the gate and having it all without looking bad through the previous ommission that has been done to me.

Eventually they will realized how it's so precious, and how i got easily affected by the charmed of solitude, the charmed of passion and sincereness, yet i do believe there still tomorrow and yet god still love me with his own way give me a direction and giving me and protect me that the way that i have been chose it's not the correct one and absolutely it's not the one that what i've been looking for this years...

living a live into the fullest maybe that could be one of things that will be so amazing todo these days. welcome the new begining inside of my heart i do hopes that everything's it's going to alrite and we will find our own way, with the directions from god.


tears in heaven...

feeling this strong

what’s love and how’s we treated our love,
so many way and so unexplainable, i have a friend ho deeply falling in love and will sacrifice many things even I’m trying my best to give some clues even gave some road sign that he is not the one, well this thing put me in a very hard position i was the man best friend while she is the most sophisticated woman i ever met. But hey Loved sometimes is about whether you had enough or you had not enough.

And i have another stories, my best fella in jakarta he is a man, and love his girl very much, never saw him that much happiness inside of himself start from rcot rdc, and they proclaimed himself and his girl to be mean each other as boy n girl friend, well I’m glad to hear that. Than what happen this LDP long fuckin distance problem had gave a great cruelness effect and never considered how this girl can throw this guy so easily and go ahead with other MAN.
and what happen this guy still care about her and he thought that this is just about unfortunately decision from the girl. WHAT?? so silly love could make other people blind..

what we gonna do as a friend just trying our best to gave them the right decision even it always be put in the right ear and come out from left ear... yeah you rite...
but hey that’s love.

and what’s happen with my love life,
I’m just had enough i don't know how to create the vulnerable about love, one thing for sure love like it or not we must sacrifice something. Such what I did, I did it passionately and like it or not had enough it, and will focus on her goal first. Never find a person with his own thought and have wonderful point of view.

love love and love..
ouch darling coz u always be my baby
I aint gonna cry no and i wont beg u to stay
if u determined to leave...
i will not standing ur way

coz i knew in ur heart......
our love will never end,
you're always be apart of me..

hey things messed up

things come and go, hey would you make some statement would you bring to the world and tell it in front of the people loudly, bout what do u feel and how you react and this feeling this strong.
Adopted from the song, i merely blind by the single activity that always getting used every single day, have you knew it deep side of my heart get used to faced it everyday and wanting more.

The starring gazing even a couple of minutes makes me believe there's something, and what something? do i really need it? why i'm fuckin curious to search the reason behind why? why there so many gates that need to be passed first, why everything getting so complicated.

First thing in my mind i had enough, and glad enough and loved it so deeply, and i'm just need to stop it and faced it reality, what i'm waiting and expected not in a way with my thought. Maybe this feeling way to buzz me and make me feeling i have this thing and will carried it away and as well throw it away.

love the thought and sincereness and will had enough it.

Iressistable overwhelmed

One day Anita just got back from Argentina in doing her exchange Student, she becomes very different from the way of life way of thought and everything. When she arrives in Indonesia her moms was very shocked since she uses very mini skirt with the tee and heels and full of make up. It was in Cengkareng on arrival gate her mom just staring without eyes gazing she didn’t even know how to welcome her daughter, she wants to get angry while she can’t her feeling of miss her and cant get her mind out of her daughter been killing her during these one year.

Anyhow Anita already backs to her home country Indonesia, she just felt very culture shocked since it was very different from clothes the way of life and everything’s, like it or not she turns to be different person every each day, very concerns with her career and as well with the way of thought she grew to be an independent woman, having load of goal in her mind to achieve the highest standard she could achieve.

Than times goes by, after a month she comes to see her friends in helping the new outbound from rotary exchange student in doing the camp, for things to be well prepared before going to the country that they already exchange them. How to accomplish home sick etc. things like that was seems unimportant indeed when Anita through the time in a year she felt how important those moment are and feeling gratefully for that.

Than she met the new outbound year 2010-2011, they are seems exhausted yet incredibly cant wait to go to their exchange country. The senior despite gave them their knowledge they also make fun of them. But there are one guy who distract anita attention, since he is very knowledgeable, smart, and cute. And he always asking anita intention by keep asking so many question and tend asking unimportant things just to get anita attention.

to be cotinued....

Too good To be true

When your hopes become reality what will you do?

In my case at hands, i loved it and never thought that would be happen, never had this imagination
Reality goes beyond my expectation... Why this thought ruin my mind lately, why, and why...
Enjoying those moment that passing by, considered it as vulnerable moment and i'm keep wondering "hey it happens.."


My point was, nothing is impossible... when it is meant tobe it will be meant tobe, Just deal with it and faced it. Heart it so deeply and i will fight this enormous condition and will LOVED IT.....
and if it's turn to be FAILED i dont even give a damn s**t....


thanks and many thanks for the vulnarable moment...

Cold Minded

Things need to be clear enough to find the reason behind why?,
i have this feeling when i'm just through the depiction of it and hey i like it and really hopes that i will have those precious moment with it. Than Gladly the times goes by, this enormous feeling had been growing up through the next level, even somehow i pretend i didn't realize it. Well i might be wrong eventually this sensitivity comes again, and keep asking why??

Some reason it already covered up what i'm waiting during years, and all the matters than i want to deal with. Well sadly i'm so preventive i like to keep it up. And stop wondering the wonderfull things to come.

And the significant step will come in the next couple of days, so how i could struglling over it and deal with it? obviously only god know it and just hopes for the best...
If it is sounds real deepest hopes asked to make it real, and go for it and stand for it and let this this happen.


well for these days i will keep it right behind my heart and accompishing nicely with loads of will from god and things to full the live into the fullest..

With loads of HUG

Maya

Personal Approach

How we approach personal stuff with huge of in diffrently matter of personal attitude.
Well sometimes we need to deal with person whichs is unbelievable suck, it could be your friend, your family, your boss or even your partner.

Well shit always happen for that matter when the conflict is arises we should make sure that dont accomplished with anger and loads of emotional think first than act later after you could think very clearly... hey but sometimes we are not angel and we could not deal without using our emotion and nobody is perfect (ahahhah very bias and abstract)

Important thing tried to care that you're not live by yourself and tried to understand people much more and you will through the conflict easily. Every body always have their own problem with huge of personal stuff and absolutely very complicated for each. People Have their own way of life and it's hard to consider it.

my point are we need to understand and tried accomplish differently personal approach wisely.